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116 Days

To tell the truth, I’ve never been particularly athletic or fit. I’ve always been klutzy, prone to accidental self-injury, and not interested in very many sports. The activities I was interested in as a child never suited me. Gymnastics? Too tall, too uncoordinated, and too afraid of gravity and breaking my skull open. Volleyball? Arms too spindly and weak. Swimming? Well, it helped that I didn’t have to deal with the effects of gravity, but I wasn’t particularly fast, and there was that one time I swam into the pool wall face-first because I had my eyes closed and misjudged the distance. Ahem. Also, see previous note about spindly, weak arms.

Anyways, a few years back, thanks to the persuasive powers of a good friend, I started running, and although I can hardly believe it myself, I loved it. Naturally, I injured myself, and so running became an on again, off again activity for me. Fast forward to February of this year when I picked it up yet again, then to April when I started a brand new fitness project. I didn’t tell very many people about it, because I wasn’t sure I would be able to do what I wanted to, but I decided that I was going to start exercising every single day and keep it up for 30 days. In between my three running days a week, I started doing pilates, power yoga, and Jillian Michaels videos (ow, y’all). Some days (like when I got the flu in May) I managed 15 minutes of weight lifting and crunches, and then collapsed in an achey heap. Other days, I did close to an hour of exercise. Most days, though, it was 30-40 minutes of something, and all I cared about was that I did something. I was tired of feeling weak, I wanted to do more strength and resistance work to make sure I didn’t get hurt running again, and I wanted to prove to myself I could do it. You guys, I did it for 116 days before I stopped. Last week, we went on a mini-vacation to Florida to visit some lovely friends, and not only was it too ungodly hot and humid to do anything outside, I was just having too much fun sipping sangria with my girls and thought I deserved a little break. I took a 6-day hiatus, and I started back up with a 2.5 mile run yesterday. No, I’m not breaking any distance or land-speed records, but I feel stronger, my muscles have more definition, and my endurance has improved dramatically, and that’s all I care about. I’m going to do at least 116 more days this time around, and I’m going to see how much farther I can get.

So yeah, this isn’t the most interesting post I’ve ever written, but you know, I’m proud of myself, and I wanted to pat myself on the back a bit. And also, if I can do it I know you can, too. Yeah, it’s hot out there. It’s hard to make the time. But if you can get through 7 days, then two weeks, then three weeks, you eventually don’t want to quit because you’ve come this far and you may as well keep going because it makes you feel really good. At least that’s how it worked for me.

© 2011, OneShoeOff. All rights reserved.

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My friends, let’s talk a little bit about irony, Alanis Morissette style. Prior to leaving for BlogHer, I had started to run again after taking a hiatus to give my shin splints a rest. But despite the break, I noticed that the pain was starting to come back. For those of you who haven’t had the singular pleasure of life with angry, inflamed tibias I will say for the record that shin splints are a b*tch. A crippling, soul-crushing b*tch that caused shooting fiery pain by the simple act of getting out of bed and walking, sorry limping, to the bathroom every morning which subsequently caused me to contemplate whether or not it might be worth it to just lay in bed and pee myself rather than endure the pain of walking 10 feet. (Dammit, I SO should have picked up one of those GoGirls at BlogHer.)

So like a sensible person, I didn’t run while in Chicago. After that stellar decision, I must have left all my sense in the hotel room safe with the crack I was smoking my valuables, because like an idiot, I brought cute shoes to wear to the conference. Not exactly uncomfortable shoes, but shoes that definitely valued their looks more than their personalities, the cheap hussies. We also stayed at a hotel a mile away from the actual conference. And there was walking at the conference (What?! Walking?! In a huge-ass hotel with conference rooms on five different floors? Nonsense!) And there was the schlepping of toddler and suitcases and carseat and stroller. And then there was pain. OH THE AGONY.

So yesterday I took a look around, found my missing smarts and saw a sports medicine doctor, who x-rayed me, lectured me, and sent me packing with a giant walking boot and firm instructions not to run or walk for exercise for two weeks. In a bitter twist of irony, your very own OneShoe has quite literally traded one single stiletto for this monstrosity.

The Boot

(Can you IMAGINE what irony would look like if I had named my blog One Shirt Off? I might be in a body cast by now! On the other hand, OneShirtOff.com would probably be getting waaaay more hits, no?)

Also, do you know how hard it is to take a picture of your own calf at that angle? But I did it because I’m a martyr like that I love you all very much. Did I mention this thing makes me limp? And that while I wear it my right leg is three inches longer than my left? And that I sound like Quasimodo lurching through our house when I walk on our hardwood floors? And that the noise terrifies the cats and makes them run away and leave me alone? Oh, wait, that’s AWESOME! It will be the one object in our house NOT coated in a layer of fur. Did I mention that it’s 90 degrees outside and this boot is both black and hot and makes my foot ooze sweat? And that I can’t drive with it on? And that ow, it still hurts. Hold me. Please? Boy, aren’t you glad you stopped by to experience this radiant bundle of leprechauns, rainbows, and joy today!

So since The Boot is going to be with me for at least the next two weeks, I think I should name it. Husband dearest suggested “Italy” since Italy is shaped like a boot. As I see it, Italy has loads of carbs, great cheeses and wines, and hoards of gorgeous men waiting to woo me while I break their hearts and declare my love for another while pointing to my wedding ring at which point they collectively decide there’s no point to living. I’m pretty sure The Boot came with none of that swag. Fail. Alas, I turn to you internet. Whaddya think? Any clever names out there for my latest footwear?

© 2009, OneShoeOff. All rights reserved.

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I need your help!  I’ve recently taken up running as a hobby…I have to pause for a moment to acknowledge how foreign that phrase sounds, even 12 weeks into this thing.  I have never, EVER been a runner; in fact it would be safe to say that I HATED to run.  Up until some friends persuaded me to try it, I thought the only good reason to run was if you were running away from something.  Preferably something trying to kill you.  Or eat you.  But other than that?   Psh, forget it.  I preferred lower impact sports, like writing the monthly check for the gym membership I didn’t use, or eating fried chicken  depending on the day of the week.  Alas, I have joined the running masses (or is it the running few?) and incidentally completed my first 5k race this past weekend.  Finishing that race only made me want to run another one (please trust me when I say I know how truly demented that sounds…it’s an illness).

Here’s where I need your help.  I’m planning to run a much longer race this fall (somewhere in the neighborhood of 10 miles longer…shit, that number never ceases to make my stomach drop), and I’m going to need motivation!  Inspiration!  Something to pump! Me up!  So tell me what kind of music you think I should be listening to while I run.  I need something peppy, interesting, but also catchy enough that I can get a little bit lost in it.  I’ve not gone so far over the deep end that I actually enjoy the pain quite yet, and some days I need the musical equivalent of a frontal lobotomy while I run.  Even if you don’t exercise, what songs do you imagine might make good running songs?  Help a girl out, will ya?  If you send me something good AND I win the half marathon, I promise to include you in my thank you speech.  Or perhaps more likely, I’ll just give you kudos right here on One Shoe Off when I drag my sorry, wheezing self over the finish line hours after the other runners have already gone home.

© 2009, OneShoeOff. All rights reserved.

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